Anonymity

The following text (including quotes) originally appeared in “shedding light…On The Dark Side of Adoption” by Mirah Riben, 1988. and can only be reprinted with permission and credit.

Unfortunately nothing has changed since that time…

The protection of the birthmother's "new life" is perhaps the most often cited reason for keeping adoption records sealed, yet ironically, anonymity may be something which in most cases, the birthmother has never requested. When you hear this concern raised, take note as to who is raising it. More often than not it is not a birthparent, or a group representing birthparents, which is voicing this concern. The National Committee for Adoption, for instance, an organization representing adoption agencies which has lobbied to keep the records sealed, has been quoted as saying women place their children for adoption with the guarantee of lifelong confidentiality (''Who Am I?" Parade, Oct. 27, 1985). This is in direct contradiction to the facts as known to the authorities in the field:

''From the data being reported...there is good reason to believe that when they surrendered their children, few mothers understood the full meaning of the confidentiality agencies now say they implicitly promised them. Are agencies forcing on these mothers the 'right' to a confidentiality they never intended to have and may not wish to maintain with respect to their children?" Doris H. Bertucci, "On Adoption," Social Work: the Journal of the National Association of Social Workers, May, 1987, Vo. 23, No.3.

''My experience has shown that birthparents are able to release children for adoption with the knowledge that the law might change at some future date...1t is my opinion that we should not assume that all birthparents want the confidentiality they were promised." ." Legislative Research Commission, "Rights of Adopted Children" report to the 1981 General Assembly of North Carolina.

''Having talked with many birthparents in recent months, I have come to believe, first, that the birthparents were not interested in perpetual anonymity but rather, that we, the agency representatives, have thought they were interested in this, due to the stigma attached in past years to the out-of-wedlock pregnancy." Memorandum, Nov. 21, 1980, Director of North Carolina Division of Social Services, "Presentation for Public Hearing on Rights of Adopted Children." Robin Peacock.Legislative Research Commission, p.8.

"The secrecy of the sealed record was to hide their shame. What it did. instead, was to intensify it by making birthmothers feel they'd done something so hideous that all references to it had to be locked away and never reopened." Kate Weinstein, "Mothers in Exile: The Aftermath of Surrendering a Baby for Adoption," Feeling Great, New York: Haymarket Group, No. 13. July, 1985, p.66.

In most agency adoptions, despite promises of confidentiality, the adoptive parents receive a copy of the adoption decree, which often contains the child's original first and last name, and sometimes the mother's first name as well. According to Delores M. Schmidt, Director of Family and Aging Services, Catholic Charities, Denver, Colorado, "Confidentiality protected his adoptive parents from publicly facing the reality of their childlessness." “Dual Heritage: The Challenge of Adoption." Charities USA, March, 1980, p.9.